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Part 2 of 'Considering Rehoming Your Dog': Correspondences with One Fret Adopter

  Part 1 was "Are You a Young Person Considering Re-Homing Your Dog? Consider This."  

-A link to that blog can be found at the end of this post.  

 
 

In this post you'll read an email correspondence between a PAFP adopter and me.  I've simply copied and pasted the emails here.  -Of course the adopter's name and email address are omitted for her privacy.  

 
 

For the reader's reference, the dog this email refers to had been confiscated by a county shelter due to neglect.  The dog then spent nearly 1 year in that shelter's custody until the owner's court case concluded. 

    Then our rescue took her in, she spent approximately one month in foster care, was adopted out to a lovely lady, returned to us within 24 hours, then about a week later, was adopted out to the person that sent this email.  -She's a gorgeous hound dog.  

 
 

-Sharing this could help someone else. 😊 

 
 

 

 

------------ Wed, Oct 6, 1:11 PM to me  

 
 

Hi Jessica,  

I wanted to write you to give an update on our Daisy girl.  

We've had her for over 2 months now and have a better feel for who she is as a dog.  

She made significant progress in some areas, not so much in others.  

When she came to us she was highly anxious...she was especially scared of rain/storms, big trucks, loud sounds, car rides etc.  

She actually had blood in her stools so I took her to the vet and he said it was anxiety. Maybe this was due to her being left out in a pen all the time? Anyway, we were able to get some medication to help her digestive tract and we started working with her on overcoming her fears. She's made great progress. I've taken her to soccer games (where she sits on my lap most of the time because she doesn't like the whistle) and to the dog park etc. We haven't had nearly the issues lately. She doesn't shake anymore when it rains. We have also worked with her on basic commands, sit, stay, shake, down. She's doing pretty good on all of those. She is very food motivated! Her skin issues are almost cleared up. No more constant scratching!  

 
 

Unfortunately, she has begun to become quite the handful in other areas. She LOVES being inside and will now fight us to go out.  

She hates wet grass, rain, cold etc. and becomes very stubborn (we usually have to pick her up and take her out) and it takes staying with her when she is outside and pulling and pushing (basically wrestling) her to go on the lawn when its wet. She now only wants to potty on our deck or the patio, which isn't good. Today, she refused to go out so I went through the whole routine but she still wouldn't go, so we came in. She then pooped about 5 big piles in my bedroom and peed in the livingroom (on my curtains!). This is a daily battle. I have talked to a trainer and also had someone come to the house that is very knowledgeable about dogs with no progress. We've even used treats. She likes going out when its warm and sunny, but that's it.  

 

Long story short, she is still not house trained, and doesn't like it outside! She also is destroying all my house plants inside and outside. She loves to play in the dirt and thinks its great fun to dump the pots over and spread it and roll in it. I can't blame her ha! It has created quite the challenge out on our deck for sure. We even put the plants up on a table and she got up there and uprooted them all. She has become very bold while we are eating and persistently and assertively jumps up and grabs our food from our plates! This also has been a daily battle. We have LOVED this baby girl, poured into her, loved on her, spent lots of money on her and have given it our BEST shot. The best way I can describe her is having a super sweet wild animal in the house. As, I looked through her paper work she is listed as 6 years old and having been outside her whole life, she is totally unaccustomed to being in a house. I think she would thrive in a farm or acreage type setting with a barn or shed with a cozy bed and blankets and a door where she could come and go. She is just not suited to a small home. I have NEVER returned a dog in my life. We love animals and love Daisy. Sadly, we just cannot keep her.  

My husbands  job is changing in Jan and he will be traveling internationally and I cannot battle  

her going outside all winter by myself. I'm so sorry!! Please let me know what would work best for you. 

 

 

 

Hello --------, 

 
 

I'm so sorry to hear all of this.  

There's a transitional period for all dogs, for some it lasts longer than for others. 

 
Are you walking her for 30 minutes minimum, once daily? Dogs are migratory animals per their ancestral DNA.  Their ancestors used to walk for several miles each day.  They must have a daily walk in order to have a happy, calm family life.  

 
A couple of things I'd encourage you to keep in mind as you contemplate re-homing her: 

-What will you inadvertently be teaching your son?  

-When you look back on this decision a year, 5 years, or even 20 years, from now, how will you and your family feel? -Shameful? -Sad? -Regretful?  

 
Having spoken with people that have rehomed a pet years after that choice was made, it's almost always a mix of shame and regret.  -It's not an easy decision, and most of the time, I don't believe it's the right decision, for the pet or the family.  

 
I've helped a half a dozen or so families and individuals decide to keep their pets over the years too, and helped them address behavior issues, and years down the road, usually just months down the road, these people are always glad they decided to make it work with their pets... their family members. They are able to 'look back and laugh' on the challenging times, because they do pass (although in the moment they seem constant I know), and they tend to be more confident people after having worked through it with a 'wild animal,' as you put it. And you're right... They are wild animals.  Dogs are wild in their most basic nature, and they keep humans more in touch with nature in their wildness, and can help them become better people through the various challenges they present to us.  

They force us to tap into our inner pack leader, and go there, to get them on the right track, calmly and assertively, as Cesar Millan says. That's what they do for me, and can do for you.  

 
 

Elizabeth, -------'s foster, is cc-ed.  

 
 

Please contemplate this carefully, and let me know if you'd be open to me coming out to work with her and you guys a bit sometime next week.  I wouldn't charge you, you could make a donation for time if you wanted, but not necessary.  

I hope you'll at least give her that one last chance at 'being helped' to be a better dog for your family before deciding wholeheartedly to rehome her. 

If not... we can help rehome her, but I'd hope she could stay with you guys while we find her a new home (less traumatic that way).  It would likely only take a few weeks to find her a new home once (if) she's listed on Petfinder. 

 
Best, 

 
Jessica L. Pita, owner and primary pet caregiver 

 

Follow up email from me the next day... 

 

👍🙏🏼🐾🤞  

I’ll keep her and you guys in thought and prayer.  

  

 
 

On Thu, Oct 7, 2021 at 8:12 AM ----- ------- <----------@gmail.com> wrote: 
 

Hi Jessica,  

Thank you for your response…I’m going to try her with a training collar that I heard about for a few days and I’ll 

get back to you.  

 
 

--------- 
 
 

Sent from my iPhone 

 
 

Some time passed... 

Sun, Nov 14, 8:56 AM 

 
Hi --------, 

 I hope things are going better with ----------. 

 
 

Anyhow, I was just thinking of you because I’ve started using an E collar with my two year old dog, Benny.  

 
 

We are working on him barking less when he sees another dog on our walks. And this thing has been a life changer.  

I highly recommend one for her. I could tell you how to use it.  

 

Sun, Nov 14, 11:26 AM 

 

Hi Jessica!  

Thank you for the idea. We have thankfully, made great strides with --------. She is mostly house trained now, has  

made progress with jumping (we’ve been using a spray bottle), and her anxiety isn’t causing her physical issues as  

much. I’ll definitely keep that collar in mind though if we run into more issues in the future.  

 
 

------ 

 
 

Sent from my iPhone 

 

 

 
That is WONDERFUL news ------- 

I'm so glad she's making progress.   

The amount of time it takes for each dog to learn and adjust varies significantly. 

 
 

I don't think --------- ever had a 'puppy-hood,' so seemingly she kind of had to go through all of that with you guys. 

She's one very lucky dog that your family adopted her. 

 
 

Jessica L. Pita, owner and primary pet caregiver 

 

 

In closing, for this doggie, thankfully things are working out.  


Rescue serves not only to 'celebrate adoptions' with adopters, but also to counsel them during trying times. And ultimately, it offers a 'safe place' to return to should it not work out with an adopter. 

 
We share our adoption successes on social media and in monthly emails.  We know people prefer to see the happy stories.  We prefer to share those ones too! But it's important to also document some of the rescue's trials and tribulations.  -They could help someone else, and someone else's pet along the way. 
 

Best, 

Jessica 

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